I Wake Up Screaming

 

Request to Post

Drew asked me to post this on You Tube since no one could figure it out. Surprisingly easy to do. 

That's me in the glasses and bad shirt on bass in the second pic, probably summer 1997.

How to Spot the Disengaged Employee

I loved this video training module from the SysAdmin, Audit, Network and Security Institute (officially the Escal Institute of Advanced Technologies, a private U.S. for-profit company founded in 1989 that specializes in information security and cybersecurity training). In the "Secure the Human" series, you are cautioned to look out for "disengaged employees."

Consulting and survey firms like Gallup have raised the alarm about "employee engagement," saying that workplaces should track how tuned in their employees are to the employer's strategy and helping advance the organization’s goals.

The SANS Institute takes it one step further and says that employees and managers should be on the lookout for those who would actively harm the organization, grabbing intellectual property and downloading it with malicious intent. You will know these types because they were once engaged but have now begun to act strangely, distancing themselves from coworkers, showing up late, and being lackadaisical.

I had to grab the illustration from their video. The suspected perpetrator guy in the foreground used to look like the others in the background. But he became disengaged. We know this because, while he furiously absconds with the latest product launch plans via the company’s secure VPN (unmonitored?), he is disheveled, neglects personal hygiene, forgets to shave, and starts wearing mismatched wacky clothing to work!

Can you spot the disengaged employee?

We need to keep an eye on this gent for he is obviously not engaged.

I love to smoke, had to quit

I enjoyed my cigarettes but was shamed, cajoled, derided and finally financially penalized by my employer to quit smoking. I recall Eric Clapton saying in his memoir that this was his hardest habit to break, harder than morphine and cocaine.

My wife gave me an audio book I enjoyed even though I laughed at its title: Allen Carr's Easyway To Stop Smoking. Its seven steps were basically prep, pick a date, and stop poisoning yourself (also known as "cold turkey"). Nothing is easy, Allen, but I did enjoy the book because it was compelling and helped to hear the British narrator communicate the author's disdain for smoking. There was reason among the colorful words and metaphors.

As a smoker, even though I was responsible and careful not to offend, pollute, or flaunt it in front of nonsmokers and kids, I was a veritable pariah. The scarlet letter came in the form of a constant harangue from ex-smokers, who are the worst about it, of course. I am aided by a QuitCoach (American Cancer Society?) paid for by my employer, a prescription for Chantix, and e-cigs. I gave my coach a 9 out of 10 probability of success because I prepped for it and have a desire to get healthier as I age. My lifelong asthma would flare up badly if I binged on cigs and I would gasp for air. That's no way to live.

Nevertheless, the smoker's life "style" still, and will always, appeals to me. I love the way burning tobacco smells and how Americans turned this Indian native past-time into a huge industry where machines starting rolling perfect and delicious smoke sticks at a rate of hundreds a minute. The industry has evolved but the same machines from the 1940s and 50s are still used today. Plantations, such as they were, in South Carolina are now condos. I never thought of myself as a "slave" to tobacco; however, I will never forgive myself if I now become a health nut and someone who seemingly takes pleasure in admonishing someone to quit with a fervor that resembles the way evangelists insist you must be born again. If I get health or other kind of religion, maybe it won't be such a bad thing.

Here's to being smoke-free. I am now a former smoker.

More 'Rights' Erosion

In Wisconsin, the state government is looking to revoke the hard-won "right" to collective bargaining for state workers.

Oh no, we're losing more rights! Where is the outcry from tea-party conservatives over this "slippery slope"? Aren't these the types of rights they fear we are losing in this country? Of course not. The correct term should be collective bargaining "privileges" because these are not constitutionally guaranteed rights, such as the right to due process.

Due process, whether codified or not, should be considered a fundamental right of all people and essential to the establishment of a society of harmony justice. Except for terrorists, of course. It seems there are rights and then there are rights.

I Don't Think I Like This 'Service Economy'

Aside from the now everyday negative news in the media--about how the sky is falling and we're in "unchartered territory" with the economy and the failure of the country's biggest and best companies (is GE next?)--is a disturbing trend that affects many in publicly traded companies.

It's called benefits loss and how your "total compensation" is being looked at very carefully, from vacation to sick time. You used to have to beg to take unpaid leave; now, you are encouraged, even forced, to take it. Enjoy carrying over your 4 leftover weeks of vacation, if you have it, because that's going to get reduced--you can, however, cash it in if you like (for 50 cents on the dollar) before you lose it.

Pension plans will be frozen and in its place a company will double its matching contribution to the 401(k) plan. If you don't contribute now, you will soon.

This got me: I wanted to update my address and other information with my old employer to be sure they had my new address. They sent me to a web site that has a disturbing notice on it:

Visit This Site Again Later

Thanks for your interest!

To allow for maintenance and updates, Your Benefits Resources
is not available at this time. You can access the site after Jun 10, 2009 at
5:00a.m. CST.

Hmmm, that date is a ways off. One would think they could at least post a phone number. If I visit on June 10 and the date gets pushed out further, I'll begin worrying harder, but it just seems to me that the economy is giving many a great excuse not to provide service at all. It's called the "new reality" and I'm now using it to justify all kinds of "reasons" why I, too, cannot provide you service today:

• the engineer we rely on for project tasks is not available at this time. I might be able to access him after Jun 10, 2009 at 5:00a.m. EST.
  

Remember how, 10 years ago, we were told about how we should prepare for this and how we were moving from a manufacturing (quality products) to a service (happy customers) economy? Well, here we are and I find the service stinks.

I am a sucker for surveys--my wife hates this about me--and I fill them out, honestly. I don't recall ever being asked to fill out so many surveys when this was a manufacturing economy. I don't think I like the service economy. I work in a service industry and find most customers hard to please.

I gave Macy*s a good score and now they are calling me, leaving messages, thanking me. I would prefer they just keep up the good work.

Just so you know now, I predict further erosion of my total compensation.

Gots to Go and Get Grown

There comes a time in life when we all must grow up. I thought I had made a good effort towards that goal when I upgraded from a Dodge Colt to a Cadillac before I turned 40. My health indeed went downhill from there as my hair got grayer and youth became more a memory. I had to have colon bypass surgery just before I got married, but I still felt like I had yet to fully grow up. Getting my PMP certification helped a bit, but I still am not making the six-figure salary I deserve! Alas, it all pales in comparison to the biggest purchase of my lifetime, a huge house in some burg called Landenberg, Pa. Boy, do I feel old now. What it took was a real lifestyle change and a big shelling out of the cash. My wife and I are excited but the taxes out there may just kill us. We settle on Friday the 13th. The Claymont house is not even on the market yet. When we'll move is anyone's guess in this market.

If tending to an acre-plus and a septic system doesn't make you feel grown up, nothing will. I can't help but wonder what my late father would say if he saw this house, which is almost bigger than the one he had built in 1973 out in Chadds Ford, Pa. With five kids, the first thing to go in the new place was the septic system (no swimming pool for you, Dad, until you fix the stench out back, sorry). My wife has visions of me chopping wood and raking leaves when all I want to do is get a better job so I can pay someone else to do it while I sip Arnie Palmers on the deck. Now that's being grown up.

An Unexpected Musical Treat

30 years ago, when I was in 8th grade, me and my friend Eggs went to see Crosby and Nash in Deutschland. They were quite good so when I got the chance to see them again last night at the Grand Opera House, I jumped at the chance. They still impress me.